There is a knock on the door.  A knock on the door is never seldom a good thing when one is on call.

A Resident Assistant enters, stage left.

“I found something in one of the rooms.” Her tone is grave.

The Resident Director, stage right, sucks in her breath.  She imagines Jack Daniels body shots gone terribly wrong.  Drugs.  Destruction.  Death.

“It was a stripper pole.”

The RD exhales.

“And I know you probably want me to do an incident report, and I told them to take it down, and don’t be too mad because they said it was a gift and . . .”

“Was it blocking the door?”

“Not entirely.  But someone would definitely run in to it if they were trying to get out in the dark.”

“Yeah.  They should move it away from the door.”

“That is what I . . . wait.  Shouldn’t I confiscate it?  Shouldn’t I do an incident report?”

“Nah!  Please.  They can strip all they want.  It’s not a violation of policy.  I just don’t want the pole to cause their untimely deaths if there is a fire.”

“Are you serious?”

“Sure.  They didn’t drill in to the ceiling or floor did they?”

“Uh, no?”

“Then great!  You know, I hear strip tease is good exercise.  Maybe we should do a wellness program with it!”

The RA exits stage left, shaking her head, no doubt wondering if she ever really knew her RD at all.